Saturday, April 11, 2015

MARCH SADNESS

Damn! Has it really been over a month since I've written a blog? Shit!

Well, that's what happens when a  HUGE bout of depression smacks you square in the face, am I right? I'm right...You loose interest in things that normally bring you joy. Such as writing, blogging, reading even. I'm just now dipping my toes back into the warm waters that is my happiness.

I've always been bipolar. It's just something I've learned to live with. I paint, sing, dance, write and laugh when I manic! And I edit writing, cruelly evaluate my life and cry when I'm depressed...usually each state of mind only lasts a week or so, but the constant UP/down of it all does get tiring. The last 30+ days was the first long depressive spell I've had since I suffered Postpartum Depression after giving birth to my daughter....which took me to dark places. Luckily, my friends in family didn't notice at all. LOL End scene. Great actors never reveal their secrets.

I'm not 100% what caused my "March Sadness" Perhaps it was the two full months of sever morning sickness, medical bills piling, the realization that we wont be able to move into a larger home any times soon and watching one of my best childhood friends go through such hard times from afar. Feeling sick, pressured, cramped and useless might make one a bit sad, yeah....

I'm equally unsure what got me out of it...I never ate much meat, but I've recently decided to become vegan. I just can't stand the way animals are treated in the massive farms and even small farms. It makes me sick. Eating vegan does make me feel lighter, more awake and I think happier.

Here's to being happy, and may-chance more blogs in the near future.



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